just a thought…

Degrees Fahrenheit is the current temperature outside as I switch on the second computer in my room. I close my air vents, because with them open, my room becomes unbearably warm and my computer which is always running, does a good job at keeping things at a livable temperature. Who knows, the electricity spent by using computers as a heat source might actually be cheaper than gas these days.

“So this is the new year, and I don’t feel any different.”

Does anyone have crazy resolutions for this year, beside the cliched “lose a billion pounds” or “take up yoga”? I’ve resolved to make an effort to practice my guitar more, write another novel this year (this might wait ’till NaNoWriMo), write another screenplay either independently or with a partner, read more, and blog more.

I should probably add ‘clean my room’, ‘play more video games’, ‘win the lottery’, ‘drink more water’, ‘take more pictures’, ‘become a better programmer’ and ‘go to bed earlier’ to the above list.

I wrote this post with Windows Live Writer, and so far, I’m liking it quite a bit. For novel writing, I would recommend checking out yWriter4, and for screenplays, celtx. The next novel that I write, will probably be written using yWriter, unless I come across a better alternative that is also free.

Classes start on the 20th. I’m taking 12 credits, (most of which are online) in addition to working 40 hours every week. We’ll see how well this works out. I’m optimistic, and extremely eager to get my associates degree finished up. I know, at my age I should be working on my Masters (no pun intended), or at least be finishing up my BA, but as long as I’m still attending school, and still educating myself, I’ll be happy. The question that keeps me awake at night is, “What do I do after this?”

The obvious choice for most people would be to simply go to a four-year university and continue working on my BA. Most of the credits I have will transfer in, and it would probably only take another two years to obtain. This option is fine, and has been what I had planned on for quite some time. However, what comes after that? Do I get a job much like the one I have, either at my current employer or somewhere else? Sure I’d probably be a programmer or network admin instead of a pc technician (and earning a higher wage), but the job is more or less the same. Not the same tasks, mind you, as those job titles differ quite a bit; I refer to the same atmosphere, the same working environment, the same, “This is broke, go fix it” pattern that plagues the IT service industry.

I want change, and I want it to be drastic.

Last night, I discovered the Hallmark Institute of Photography and became extremely interested. I’ve only been taking pictures for a couple years now, and I would like to think that I am doing pretty good for the little amount of professional instruction I have had, but I could be much, much better. Now would probably be a good time to show you some examples of stuff I have done, and for that, I point you to my deviantArt profile (which I should also make a permanent link on here, somewhere) http://benmasters.deviantart.com. I like taking pictures, really I do. The question here is, “Do I like photography so much that I could seriously see myself making it a full-time profession.” “Not in Jackson,” is my first response, but the more serious answer to this is, “yes.”

The problem I have, lies with the myriad of interests that swarm around in my head and constantly battle for my attention and time. Yes, I am interested in photography and can see myself making it a full-time career. But I can also see myself writing professionally, making movies (or being involved in the process somehow), or heaven forbid, working in a cubicle, fixing the latest glitch that has popped up on the network, or fixing some piece of code that causes the program to crash whenever the user launches their media player of choice. The scary thing is that I don’t hate everything IT related as much as it might seem here. I am fascinated by a great deal of technology on a daily basis and I yearn to understand the inner workings of it. Indeed, the IT hobbies in my head win my attention and time every now and again; I believe I have just been doing it too long, and am in need of a change.

I want to create something. Something that matters, something that improves the world of the individual using it, viewing it, consuming it or doing otherwise with whatever it is intended to do. I want whatever I create to have a bigger impact than Jackson, MI.

The first step, is to finish my associates degree. This is a personal goal that is going to be met, because it should have been met a while ago and it will give me at least a little something to fall back on should my hopes and dreams be crushed by some act of God.

“Why not finish up your BA and then pursue your dreams,” you might ask, and that is a very good question, and something that may actually happen. One reason is time. I’m not getting any younger and I would like to start doing something creative with my time. Reason number two is partly what this entire post is about; why would I complete my BA in something that I don’t want to do? The only reason I would complete my BA, is so I could get a higher paying job. Money is nice and all, and I would really like to have an endless supply of it; but unfortunately, money does not motivate me. I am only interested in having enough money to support the things that I need it for. Owning a house in every civilized nation, and having a garage with twenty exotic cars in it, is not something that appeals to me. The third reason is the security blanket factor. By having a BA that I can fall back on, should this all not pan out, I believe I would be less motivated to succeed. The associates degree is just to keep me from making minimum wage.

So, by this time next year, this will become much more relevant, as I will be faced with the question presented in the first paragraph of this post, and forced to make a decision. I have a year to think about it, plan, and have life throw a few more curves at me that could very likely make this all irrelevant. In the meantime, if anyone would like to throw several thousand dollars my way (like $50,000) so I can pay for Hallmark and sleep in a bed at night, leave me a comment, and I’ll send you my address. I guarantee that I will take at least one beautiful picture in your honor.

Did I mention that I’d also like to go to AFI?

In other news, I bought a Rubik’s Cube last Thursday. I had the sudden urge to learn how to solve one, and I have five of the seven steps (or patterns) memorized. In a week or so, you should be able to throw me a cube in any state, and I should be able to solve it within a few minutes. I’m not trying to become a speedcuber or anything like that (although it sure is fun to watch), but as long as I can solve it within a few minutes, that’ll be good enough for me.